Saturday, 24 October 2020

>>>#24/10/20 Forget what I said last night

 I cannot live without you, honey.  What was I thinking?

You and Els mean the world to me.  How can I let you go?

I was being selfish.  I feel that my life will be one big disappointment.

What if KBOOOM 2041 doesn't happen?  Will I am not be living a lie?

It bugs me to think that I am not Sine Cera.  I don't want to be living a lie, Sarah.

And yet I gave everything that I got to this cause.  I was in the State of Knowing.

Maybe everything is just one big bullshit.  4 years we spent together might just be an illusion.

Maybe I'm being delusional.

The burden of proof is too great for me.  I don't think I can bear this alone.

I'm sorry if I hurt you.  That was not my intention.  I was feeling down.

Perhaps I'll take the whole thing with me to the grave.  I'll be the greatest autar Keling.

What have I done?

All I am feeling now is guilt, guilt, guilt.

Am I for real?  I certainly don't feel like one.

mm

  

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