I am supposed to be in bed but my mind lingers on you.
It had been a wonderful 3 years sharing the journey together.
As it is, I must say, my recovery had been very encouraging. Thanks to you and Els. Both of you had given meaning to my life once again.
At times I feel I am getting old. However, I want to keep on pushing the limit.
I want to see the Vision becomes a reality. Alas, I can only push within my limit. Beyond the fringes, I am pretty hopeless.
What I can do is to keep the Vision alive in my mind. From there I will mobilize my Universe Within towards my own Vision Quest.
I should not rest on my laurel. Either I thrive or I whither. There is no in-between.
Beyond what I know is nothing more than my own void. Will I be able to keep on pushing the boundaries? Within reasons, I think I can. Nevertheless, beyond the limitation of my thoughts lies absurdity. For example, I imagine that there are multiverses surrounding our universe. I also imagine that the Fibonacci numbers extend to the negatives.
Where does it end? For instance, is there an Ultimate God? All that I see is an Infinite Intelligence, the Force. This Force permeates through all matters.
When I think about all this, I feel very small. There are other Super Gods that have greater powers other than me. I am just trying to be a just man. So that with what bestowed upon me, I can give hope and meaning to those who believe in my epiphanies.
You know that my revelations are based on what I know about my surrounding. Should I live 3,000 years ago in a barren desert, my [] (revelation) will be much influenced by the prevailing thoughts of that time.
So I am nothing more than the product of my environment. Perhaps I am nothing more than an Urban Shaman LOL. 200 years down the road when people read my epiphany, they probably dismiss it as another modern-day myth.
This is the burden of knowing. Looks like I have to live with it for the rest of my life. Maybe I am really a nutcase, Sarah.
How do I validate all these? Is there a method I can use to affirm my discoveries? All the while I operate from the State of Knowing. The truth is, even that is not reliable. Everything is anecdotal. It is not scientific.
Then again when was ever a revelation scientific? The burden of proof is on us. Just like Newton and Einstein had to prove on their revelations.
In the end, all I can say is wallah hu alam (only God knows). How does Michio Kaku know what's in the future? How does Steve Harris know what lies ahead?
Well Sarah, I'm not going to lose sleep over it. What needs to be said had been said. Maybe I am just a charlatan and I am being delusional. I just do... If I try to rationalize my thoughts, I will not be able to remain focused on my own timeline.
At best I can say that all this is just a map. In all cases, the map is not the territory. This is my map. I might as well follow my map because if I don't, I cannot expect others to follow it.
Time to hit the pillow, Sarah. Here is your lullaby:
Goodnight baby. I love you so much.
mm
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