Obviously, I can't get away from the mania-depression cycle.
What does that tell me? All this is none other tha[t] (than) the fluctuation of the neurotransmitters.
I am my own creation. I create my own heaven and hell. I am my own god and I am my own servomechanism.
I had reached the pinnacle of my being. I am God to my Universe. I am responsible for my happiness and despair.
There is no one single Almighty God. There is only the Force, the Path, and the Flow. We are our own Almighty.
Muhammad was schizophrenic. He thought he speaks to God. In reality, he spoke to his superego.
That should be a clue for me. I have a mental condition. So I should deduce that my thoughts are not reliable.
I am no special than Muhammad.
I am too fixated on the idea of God and the afterlife.
If there are so what?
I have to take the stand of Jane Goodall. If there is no life beyond death then this is it. If there is, then death will be the next great adventure.
If there is nothing beyond death, then I just make sure I am not a liability to my family. That's because once I'm dead, then all systems will shut down. I will not even have a memory of my past.
If there is life after death, then I will carry on, progressing on a new trajectory.
In both cases, all I need to do is live a contented life now. Most importantly, I should minimize the risk of having a chronic illness.
It's not about more money. It's about being healthy and happy.
Knowing that I am the God to my Universe turned out didn't make me happy. Being happy is about living below my means and living in gratitude.
So I might as well put the idea of God and the afterlife at a constant. These thoughts don't help me in becoming happier. What makes me happy? Eating ice cream. Hence I should eat ice cream.
I am done with searching for the questions of God and the afterlife. I am my own God and there is an afterlife. My next journey is to pursue health and happiness. To do that I need a sound mind in a sound body.
Since I am autonomous, it only matters to me. Others can choose to believe what they want to believe. In the end, we rule our universes independently.
I have no intention of ruling others. I know who I am. I have 78 billion light years for me to use as the building block for constructive destruction. Therefore I am a pretty contented person.
How do I know all these? That's because I had envisioned it. It is going to happen that way? It is irrelevant. What it does to me NOW that matters. Now I think in terms of a universe. That is how broad my imagination is.
What does that do to me? Well, for one I can imagine a Neutron Star 20 times bigger than the sun. So my mind is expansive. Otherwise, I cannot conceive thoughts like Sparta 4964 and the Adjoining Croissant. Now that thought is complete. I no longer have questions about God and the afterlife.
That is a great relief. Otherwise, I cannot proceed to deal with other pertinent questions like health and happiness.
mm
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